Can I win her back or have I lost her for good? What should I do during seperation Other days it seems that while happy to see me, behind the scenes she is overthinking about things or stressed about her problems. Best, and this messed with my head and I believe it had a huge role in the breakup. Best, Here is a link to where you can access the coaching page https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/ Im going to leave her be and hopefully shell reach out to me. I dont want to tell her that my marriage is on the rocks already even before i met her. What I am saying is that you got to this point because you lost something within yourself, in the relationship, and you need to get grounded in who you are and how you can be a better man in this relationship for yourself and for yourself only. Hello Deepak, Or with messages but no meet ups, or totally no contact? She has 4 kids they are all step kids but Ive spent 10 yrs of my life with them. Hi Scott. Wife had moved to the country UK after marriage and her dream was to work in London. The key here is finding the value that you offer her and not having to make up for the things that YOU think you may lack. I found no end to the issue to I decided to message her telling her things feel off lets talk. with all this said we do have some indifferences which we debated on a few occasions such as medical values to having a vaccine for the current Covid virus which Im currently not comfortable to take due to my medical conditions. Does this help? Seems like there may be something missing that is keeping her from committing to you. So I let it rock for a few hours and then we said goodnight. I get nervous (probably just some insecurity) that she might be talking to a new man, but I can say she has always been very upstanding, trustworthy and honest with me from day one and something I value about her. Right now i really do not know what to do, I found also a flat to move in order not to stay in a flat that is full of memories. It is very painful mam. I again replied ok if thats what you really need. I realized afterwards how much of a mistake that was. or am I just supposed to suck it up and be a man. During that space she texted me and called me regularly as if the space was never requested but day by day she started to get more distant still texting me but not letting me see her to show her Ive changed. We have been together for over 2 years now and she claims that I am the love of her life and I believe it as well. This is the only way that you can dissect the relationship to see what you might have done wrong and how you can overcome this so you can support your partner now through positive actions and change. We had our introduction late November and surprisingly, after a late night phone argumen (was calling her and she was on a call for so long that unlike her, she will cut or call me back but she didnt, I was crossed). but still we managed to survive it until now. Hey, Ive been in a relationship with this girl for 2yrs now she said she needed time time apart to work on yourself course she feels she like she has lost herself in our relationship and she cant be alone anymore without me she doesnt wanna feel like she cant live without me, she said she doesnt want a relationship and suggested i should move on what should I do course I still love her and I want to be with her is there any chances of us being together? I suggested doing so to see if things changed and fix it and also suggested to give us no contact space and reconnect in a month or two to let us work on ourselves because I did not want it to end and wanted to work things out. But she is so cold in her response to me. Just let her be. As humans sometimes when we are feeling a little overwhelmed we can lash out and just need some time to gather ourselves and it seems, to me at least, like that could be whats going on. this is hard for me . Would giving her space now give her the right image of me or would she only remember the last desperate me? Thats the most important and attractive to a woman. Hi Jeremy, -Apollonia, I have recently been in a relationship with a girl only 2 months, it was going very well and we both were being quite full on with each other and spending a lot of time together. Its natural for a guy to want to convince his girlfriend to give him another chance. Im so sorry to hear about this and I know how tough this can be to deal with. Best, There are many things you can do immediatelyto get her to feel differently about you and get her to feel respect for you again, BUT first you have to be willing to change some things about yourself. I would encourage you to book a session with me here https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching-2/ so I can help guide you. I didnt give her the space she asked for because i felt cheated on. A girl who is used to being on her own will probably say (at one point or another) that she "doesn't need you.". When a girl says she needs space, the most impressive thing you can do for yourself and your girlfriend is to not call or text her. We got engaged about a year and a half in. Then this following week i did the same went over didnt tell her i was we went outside and talked for a bit told me that stuff has only gotten worse and i held her in my arms. Best, This blog will answer your questions. Hey, I was dating this girl for about a year and 3 months and just last month she decided that we needed space. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching-2/ I treated her like crap towards the end. Probably too great and fast with both of us just recently going through separate divorces. But on the issue she said to me that when I do borrow money from her I should atleast try and repay well according to me right now for the past five months ive had no job but still searching so means of paying her back is close to zero. Sorry to hear that, well address this as soon as we can. Or she might have a lot on her mind, and you want to be affectionate with her and are avoiding the fact that she is not happy right now or even satisfied with herself at that very moment. Best, Think about how you will get your point across and still be present to her needs while staying true to the man you are. Hi Smith, I am enjoying my life and giving her space. During the next couple weeks I was working on better myself and overall attitude. If you keep trying to talk to her or keep trying to pursue, she is going to block you and run in the opposite direction. Secondly, she is mentioning that this relationship is not healthy. Im sorry shes sick and I know this is incredibly hard. You want to be respectful, but you also should show her that youre confident and youre happy no matter what with her in your life and without her in your life! She said she needs space. Team Apollonia. I was very upset and I expressed my anger and disappointment to my fianc at the time. There might be a disconnect, or she might not have the same feelings for you. It was clear to me that she is aware that we are about to develop a serious relationship. Yes, this is the best thing that you can do. I could really use your advice because you know what youre talking about in your article. She is super awesome, caring, passionate, Down to earth, I feel so bad for her cause no one has treated her as she should be treated with respect and love, at a time where she needs it! I read a lot of your blogs and I have a question. But on one hand we would be a sweet, caring man that proves his love and commitment, while also respecting her space. My girlfriend of 3 years and a month, this last past Sunday kinda blindsided me and Im not sure what to do and whether we are done or not. A bit of a back story is that my parents split up and this has been affecting me and my family and my sister is not doing good at the moment so and when I got back from a Christmas trip she noticed I was different and as time went on I guess she was getting too emotionally involved and it started affecting her . So many people yearn for something outside of themselves, but you have all the answers within. Best, Also, you cannot change overnight and actions speak louder than words so proving to her that you are changing by just telling her can cause more harm than anything else. She loves me she has said it multiple days so far but she said she needs to find herself needless to say she is 39, 40 in 3 weeks. While I was in jail she was always so supportive and sent me money when she didnt need to and I just feel in love with her even more because I saw how great she is, I feel for her more than she has with me (im the type that wears my heart in my sleeve. She says she needs time and space to sort out her feelings for me and im scared that im going to lose her and my kids. Apollonia. But also, you will be forming a foundation where this woman will not want to do this again as you were honoring space for her. She said she agreed that it was nice to talk, and that was it. Best. She admitted during a text fight that she still loved me, but was so stressed out about everything in her life. She hasnt completely shut the door on me because she last said that she cared about me and that shes here if I need to talk to her and that shes worried about me. Required fields are marked *, document.getElementById("comment").setAttribute( "id", "aa97e5e7f513ef52f232a25a68d09923" );document.getElementById("b95876403b").setAttribute( "id", "comment" );Comment *. How do I handle it when she wants to talk a bit but not meet me during this time? Hello i have been with my girlfriend 1year now and she is been hurting from her ex boyfriend after that shes been dating gorls until she knows me after that we been in a great relationship we talk everyday and always told she doesnt want me to breakup with her now after 1 year we did have a problem and asked for break i ask her to forget i talk with many friends i did go to see her even ahe didnt want to now she bloked me from all social media and follow two guys on Instagram that i bloked because they want her she is so cold with me and even dont care i think please help i feel really because iv been faithful to her and never ever did something bad to her pls help sos. We didnt end on bad terms, I do not wish to bother her but there is something that feels wrong about leaving her alone, but I dont know if this is what she needs. She said no and that if she did she would be honest. I thought (initially) that this statement led her to say she wasnt ready to build a relationship, but thinking back on it, it may help her in the long run? Apollonia, Hello Apollonia, I am very confused. I know she loves me but she just not sure if shes in love with me. After 2 days of no contact she texts me that she couldnt sleep so she sent a voice message of her singing a Disney song (cute) and a good night message. We had fights, and the fights got messier and harder everytime. You were correct! She suffers from anxiety and I havent helped with being snappy, clingy and needy recently due to some developments that turned me into a momentary wuss. I didnt want to go because of our agreement, but decided to go for her sister (we are cool with one another). I became distant? The whole time I thought this had nothing to do with me until I realized she was pulling away bc I had been pushing her away. Thank you for your answer (: Hello Francis, We recently spent six fantastic weeks as friends with benefits. Hi Apollonia, She was my staff but a few months ago ttansferef to another company. Do I walk away or can I tell me how to make her mine again. Jesus, this was spot on. We ended that conversation on very good terms even joked and had a little sexual tension and flirtation. I think it is best to not text or call or or anything and just wait to see if she initiates contact back with me? my family and I felt they just didnt try hard enough. because the guy has stopped building on his woman's feelings of respect, attraction and love for . She also said I have the biggest heart and sweetest soul and that all I do is out of love and respect and to help her then concluded saying but I think as of right now, I just need space. Then I told her Im more than happy to give her that space and how much space she needs. All you can do keep being you and keep going.